Sad day for me

[Jer's Girl]

I had a major set back today. I had an appointment with my surgeon tomorrow to discuss when I was going to get the reversal for my ileostomy and I was really looking forward to it since my GI told me that as far as he was concerned, I could get the reversal as early as six weeks form now. That's all well and good, but as you know it takes a while to get a surgery date so I was very anxious to get everything nailed down.

While I was at work today, they called to tell me that my surgeon had an emergency surgery so everyone that was scheduled for tomorrow would have to be rescheduled. The earliest that they could get me in is September 7, and that is just to talk to the Dr! So, for sure not getting the reversal when I was hoping.

As I was having a major melt down at work emotionally, my bag leaked. It leaked enough to show on my clothes. I went home for the day.

I'm just really frusterated and sad. I don't know what else to say. It's just been a really hard year and I was looking at the reversal as a clean slate. It's hard for me to act like a grown up and be brave right now.

 

[Jennjenn]

Awww I feel so bad when I read this. I was so happy for you when you found out the news about the reversal. I can empathise with you. I remember the melt down I had and it was only a couple weeks more from the time they told me it was ok to get it done. I give everyone who has had or has any kind of ostomy a lot of credit. I did not handle it very well when I had mine and it was only for 5 weeks that I had it. ( I feel like a baby for saying yes only 5 weeks) I had a melt down every day especially the day they told me no for 2 weeks that I had to wait for 5. It is perfectly understandable to be upset. I know you have had yours longer and I do not mean to sound ridiculous for what I just said about how short of time I had mine. Hopefully the time will go by quick for you and I wish you the best of luck for the appointment to get the date for the reversal. I think that you are a strong person!

 

[Jerman]

Hi Jer's Girl, I think anyone would have crashed a bit after such a lousy day. It is bad enough to feel like hell but when outside issues (dumbass docs) scheduling appointments, and the physical embarrassment all hit at once, it is just a bit much to handle. You don't always have to be a big girl or be brave all of the time. We all fall hard at times just lean on friends either here or in your life to help ya stand back up when you are ready. good luck JG, I hope things resolve soon.

 

[Crohn's 35]

Awe sweetie, I am so sorry!!!! I know that is such a major let down! Having said that, I believe everything happens for a reason and it wasn't your time for surgery. Sept 7th is a good luck number! :hang: but keep us posted ok! Good luck!

 

[MisB]

You don't have to act like a grown up here and be brave here. We are the shoulder when you need one and as for me, I will never grow up! I'm so :sorry: that you are having such a horrible day. Any one of these things by itself is a hurdle, but to happen all at once. I'm glad you were able to go home. Do something to pamper yourself.

I know Sept. 7th seems a long time for now, but for me it seems to soon. It'll be my mother's 80th birthday and I want her to have a huge party, but I'm in the hospital now and have been fighting a really bad flare since April. So, don't know if we'll have a party or not. It's odd how the same time and different circumstances can make things look so different.

Anyway, :hang: and as I said, pamper yourself, whatever that may be for you.

:getwell::rosette2: and lots of :hug::hug: and :kiss::kiss:

 

[Jer's Girl]

Thank you everyone for your replies and support. As always, it means so much to me. I'm really handling this news badly today. I'm just sick of having to be brave.

MisB- I'm sorry that you are still doing poorly. I hope that you are out of the hospital and back on your feet soon.

 

[kello82]

aw hun im so sorry =( that is so painful...that feeling of great hope and encouragement just dashed away at once.
its like when you are excited for an event and are just about to go when it gets cancelled. THAT feeling except on a massive scale of importance.
so go ahead, sulk for a while. eat ice cream and watch a movie. just escape this life for a little while. you wont necessarily feel better when you come back, but you will feel different.

hugs. xox

 

[Jennifer]

Oh my gosh! I'd be devastated too. For both issues mentioned. It'll be ok though. You're still getting it removed so stay positive.

 

[6hWQ1whjmu]

Stay Positive

Stay Positive and go ahead and scream,cry and generally freak out! Then take some deep breaths, find a shoulder to cry on and someone to give you some hugs! I have had a few breakdowns in public rest rooms of just plain sobbing after leakage, but I have been lucky
enough to have a few friends who have rescued me .

 

[MapleLeafGirl]

Sounds like a rough day to say the least. Stay focused on the fact that you are less than a month away. I will be thinking of you.

 

[Silvermoon]

*Silver gently hugs Jer's Girl so as not to squish her bag and cause another leak...*

(((((((((((((((((((( J G ))))))))))))))))) Definitely alright to "not feel like a big girl" today. Heck, I have had a month of wanting to be young enough to crawl into someone's lap and be "babied"....

It is frustrating when something you want so much seems so far away the closer you get to it, but it will eventually get here....

So for now, find a box of tissue, your fav junk food, a good movie, and settle in for a "pity party".... You deserve one today.....

Sending warm thoughts....

 

[Astra]

Hi Nicole

aw really feel for you hun, you gotta go and sulk, cry your leg off, hit someone or just go to bed!
It's a setback but it's still on the Horizon, counting the days til the 7th, not long to wait now, try not to let it get you down, look at how far you've come, it's a massive achievement!!!
xxxxx

 

[acg101]

Hey Jer, Sorry to hear about your set back. The leak, I guess it is part of what we have to deal with from time to time. I try the Convatec system, and so far so good, 3 days with no leal using your system honey, so I know you can overcome the leak.
regarding the surgery day, dont worry, it will be there before you know it.
big hug
((((((((((((((((((x)))))))))))))))

 

[ameslouise]

You can kick and scream when someone pulls the rug out from under you! Not fair!

You get all psyched up in your head and them something out of your control $%^&* it all up!

Give yourself a good cry and consider yourself hugged! - Amy

 

[Jer's Girl]

Thank you all so much! Leave it to my fellow crohnies to understand how hard this has been. You all are so brave, I know I can be brave too!

 

[belle1999]

:hug:

 

[Jer's Girl]

I am at work today. Yesterday was horrible, but I am better today. I have decided to stop feeling sorry for myself and try to remember how bad my life was before. Dealing with this is cake compared to that. Thanks again guys. I love/ need this forum.

 

[whysoserious]

I'm glad you are feeling better today! You are going through a lot and sometimes you just need to sulk and be frustrated. You are only human and you are going through things that most people never will. It's okay to feel sorry for yourself sometimes!

 

[Jerman]

very happy that you are having a better day, hope you have a good run of good days in a row!:getwell:

 

[acg101]

Hi Jer's - I am glad you are feeling better today.
Regarding the leaks, I called the woc nurse support line at Convotec and she was VERY helpful with her advice, so between your 'bath idea' and her input my skin around the stoma looked so much better today.