Cat's Exercise Diary

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Doing a bit better day by day but still not feeling up to walking. I went back to work today. Mornings are still challenging with nausea, bathroom trips, weakness, no appetite, etc. As the day goes on those symptoms gradually improve. So once I get past the morning yuckiness then I'm at least functional.

I made 3 more hats yesterday. :p I had bought a small cabinet recently for my craft room, and it's now stuffed full of handmade hats and scarves. In a few months once the weather starts to turn colder, I'll donate a bunch of them to a cancer hospital. I know that hats are always in demand for cancer patients.

We've been having some very strong thunderstorms off and on here, so I don't know when I'll be able to walk again. It depends on the weather and on how I'm feeling. Saturday I'm going to visit my grandma and I'm looking forward to that. I made a photo book for her birthday next week, so I'm going to bring her that book as her birthday gift. I'm sure she'll love it, she loves looking at photos.

I actually get a 4-day weekend coming up - they gave us off of work both Mon and Tues next week for Independence Day (4th of July). I'm hoping that I'll be feeling well enough and that the weather will cooperate so that I can take some walks and be active. That's the current goal.
 
Pretty wet and miserable here too. We had thunderstorms overnight last night and more coming today. Tomorrow looks like the one non-rainy day in the forecast, so I'm going to try to get out and walk as much as I can. I'm guessing we'll probably take my grandma outside for a walk, but those are usually just a short, slow shuffle through the parking lot (she uses a walker now and has become frail and very unsteady on her feet).

Aside from tomorrow, the long weekend looks like it'll be rainy. Hmph! I might end up doing a lot of shopping as well...
 
The weather held out this afternoon - it's supposed to rain, but not until later in the day now. So I snuck out for a quick walk at lunchtime. It was very muggy and humid because of all the recent rain, but it was still nice to get out for a walk. My guts felt okay the whole time, too. Definitely a success! I'm going to continue trying to get walks during breaks in the rain.
 
I had a pretty active long weekend! Saturday was the only day I didn't take a walk. I had a very good visit with my grandma that day, she was in a great mood and was mentally coherent enough to even understand my dad's bad jokes. :p Afterwards I had dinner with my dad and brother. The visit, travel time, and dinner took up the bulk of the day, so I didn't have time to walk that day. It also rained that day - wasn't supposed to, and maybe it didn't rain at home, but as soon as I got on the highway to head to my grandma's facility, it started pouring so hard that I could barely see the road ahead of me! That was a bit scary. Fortunately everyone slowed way down. We did manage to get my grandma out for a short, slow walk in between rain storms, but I don't really count that as a walk as we probably made it about 100 feet down the parking lot and then turned around and shuffled back.

Sunday hubby had to work. I took Lily on a walk that day. Monday and Tuesday we were both off. We walked on Monday quite a bit, walked Lily and ran some errands and walked around stores. We had a bit of a windfall, I had an old accordion and hubby managed to finally sell it, so we had a few hundred dollars in cash from that sale. We ended up buying lobsters and had those for dinner on Monday - yum! Tuesday we also walked Lily, and we took a bike ride too! I had wanted to go to the zoo, because there are baby lion cubs at our local zoo. It was open on the holiday, and the zoo is only about 2 miles from our house. So we rode bikes there, wandered all around the zoo, saw the cubs, and rode home. That was a lot of activity for one day!

I'm feeling fairly well guts-wise. My jaw is giving me troubles lately, though. I think I have TMJ. It was pretty bad about 10 or 12 years ago, I remember a few mornings waking up and my jaw was just locked, I couldn't open nor close it. And a lot of pain while chewing, a lot of clicking in the jaw, etc. It was my left jaw back then, and it's my left jaw now too. It hasn't locked like that yet, but there has been a ton of pain lately. We went out for sushi last night for dinner, and every time I went to open my mouth to take a bite of sushi, it was just tremendous pain. It was pretty horrible. I googled, and there really isn't a good treatment for TMJ from the sounds of it. It said to do things like, take tylenol for the pain, try not to clench my jaw, etc. Ugh. It went away for 10 years, so I'm hoping it goes away again soon!

Fitness goals for the week are iffy. It's looking like it's going to be very warm out (90+ degrees F) and then bad storms again tomorrow. Friday it's finally looking like it'll cool down and stop raining. So I'm hoping to be active outdoors again on Friday. I'll do what I can until then.
 
Sounds like a really good weekend Cat.I wish we had a Zoo close by,I'd be there every week at least.I saw your post about the baby bird.It's amazing how they survive when they're so tiny.It's been an awfully wet week so far,although we managed a ride on Monday.We planned a whole afternoons ride today but it's been heavy drizzle,so we just had a walk into town instead.Maybe tomorrow.The kids break up for summer vacation this weekend,7 weeks,sigh !!! so no matter where we go it'll be busy,especially at the coast.We do have a couple of summer fayres close by,this weekend and next.They're within walking distance.Lots of stalls and music and motorbikes and classic cars,some American,so I'll look forward to that.
 
Yes, I love our zoo, it's free admission (I always donate a few dollars when I go there though). It's not a huge zoo but it's quite nice for the size, and it's right on the lake shore and near the arboretum, so it's in a very pretty area. I go there as often as I can. Like you said, with the schoolkids being on summer break, it's very busy there this time of year. The kids here get close to 3 months of summer break, they've been out of school for nearly a month already and won't go back until late August (I think - I don't have kids so I never pay close attention to those dates!). The parking lots at the zoo are always full in the summer, so biking there is the way to go. Have fun at the faires!
 
Cat-a-Tonic said:
Yes, I love our zoo, it's free admission (I always donate a few dollars when I go there though). It's not a huge zoo but it's quite nice for the size, and it's right on the lake shore and near the arboretum, so it's in a very pretty area. I go there as often as I can. Like you said, with the schoolkids being on summer break, it's very busy there this time of year. The kids here get close to 3 months of summer break, they've been out of school for nearly a month already and won't go back until late August (I think - I don't have kids so I never pay close attention to those dates!). The parking lots at the zoo are always full in the summer, so biking there is the way to go. Have fun at the faires!
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Man, I wish our zoo was free admission! The cost is over $15 just to get in the gate and then you have to pay more for the cost of the train ride, butterfly garden, feeding the giraffes, stingray bay, etc. Of course, I usually end up going to the gift shop for a souvenir. The last time my mom and I went back in January, I ended up with 2 stuffed animals which were pretty pricey, but they are adorable and very well made. I came home and did some research and the same stuffed animals could have been bought online with FREE shipping for $10 less. :( We also ate lunch at the cafe which was pricey, too. I really wanted to go and have some fun because the following week, I had my tonsillectomy and knew I'd be laid up for 2-3 weeks (ended up being 3 weeks).
 
I am also a sucker for stuffed animals, I have way too many. The coolest zoo I've been to was Ueno Zoo in Tokyo (they have pandas!) and yes, I got a stuffed animal there, even though I didn't have room in my suitcase for one. :p Our local zoo also has a train and a carousel which cost a buck or two to ride, but parking and admission are both free. There is a small cafe at our local zoo too, but they only sell foods I can't eat (hot dogs, hamburgers, etc) so I never eat there.As for paying more for your stuffed animals than they would have been online - hopefully that extra cost went to help pay for the animals' care at the zoo? I always try to not feel bad about paying a little extra for something if I know that the extra cost is going to a good cause.

I do kind of want to go to the Milwaukee Zoo soon, though, which is going to be pricey. They have a Body Worlds exhibit there right now but it's plastinated animals instead of people, it looks very interesting. And of course at Milwaukee you do pay for parking, entry, and there's a separate entry fee for the Body Worlds thing too, so that's going to get expensive. I'm hoping I can talk hubby into taking me there at some point soon.

Fitness update: It was storming most of the afternoon yesterday, but as I was heading home from work, the rain stopped and the sun briefly came out! And more importantly, the rain had cooled things down considerably - it had been 90 degrees out but it cooled down to more like 70 degrees. So I zoomed home and was able to walk Lily in between rain storms. There were tons of mosquitoes and I got bit every time we stopped (if she had to potty or sniff something or whatever), and it was super humid out. But aside from that, it was a nice walk, not too hot out, and we didn't get rained on. Today it's looking to be hot and stormy again, so we'll see what happens. I'll walk Lily if the weather allows, and if not, I'll try again tomorrow.
 
Cat a tonic. Im still silently following ur replies. Lol. Its cool to read them. I got a question for u if i may ask. I got a friend living in the usa too. He is struggling with work offcourse because of multiple illnesses like me. I remember that u said that u had some social protection contract to protect getting fired at work. U can leave work and stay home on very bad days wich is logical offcourse! I do it too in europe. Is this social protection contract only for goverment jobs? Or what job do u do? How can he subscribe for such a social protection? Where can he get some info about this? He really needs this too. I would very much appreciate it if u could reply here and give some basic info for my friend. Thx girl!!
 
Kenvh, sure - it's called Family Medical Leave (or it's abbreviated as FMLA). It means that you can take more time off of work (I think it's up to 90 days over the course of a year) due to a chronic health condition, without being punished for it. I'm not a government worker and I think everyone is eligible to get it. I believe you have to be employed for at least one year in order to qualify for it. You do not need to have a diagnosis, your doctor needs to fill out some of the forms and I was told that what they need to see from the doctor is that you have a serious ongoing medical condition, even if it's not diagnosed yet. Your friend should talk to his Human Resources department at his workplace, they can give him the forms to fill out and should be able to give him more information about FMLA. I googled and found this link which should also be helpful to him:
https://www.dol.gov/general/topic/benefits-leave/fmla

Good luck to your friend!

Fitness update: It was horrendously hot out all day yesterday, way too warm to even think about exercise, so I didn't. It is looking to be cooler out today, and hopefully no more storms for a couple days at least, so I'm planning to walk on my lunch break today and maybe will walk Lily after work too. Tomorrow I'm hoping to do something active, maybe I can convince hubby to go on another bike ride with me and I'll probably walk Lily at some point again then. Sunday it's looking a bit warmer, so we'll see what the weather does. I might go visit my grandma again that day, as it's her 85th birthday on Sunday. I already gave her her gift, but I could bring her a small cake/cupcake.
 
Managed 10ml cycle today.Bum's a bit numb hahaha.Thought we better make the effort before the weekend fayre etc.But there were lots of people about, it being the coast.I try not to moan about them to much ,as we have it to ourselves out of season.Enjoy your weekend....don't they come around quick ? or is it me just getting old.
 
Thx cat a tonic. Appreciate it! I will send it to my friend. He will be happy with is information. Thx again
 
Kenvh, you're welcome!

Carol, ha ha, no, weekends do not come around quickly! :p Not when you work full-time like I do anyway. It's been a short week because of the holiday, I only had to work Wed - Fri, but I still had to cram a week's worth of work into those 3 days, so it's felt like a long week. It's certainly been a busy week.
 
So it's an age thing then.I think most people over a certain age would agree with me though.The more time you have to waste,and I waste plenty,the quicker it passes.Don't worry Cat.your time will soon come soon enough, and the world will be over-run with woolly hats and stuff.hahaha.
 
Ha, you think that the world isn't already overrun with my handmade hats and scarves? ;) Ha ha! I'm only 37, I have to be at least 62 to take social security and 65 is the age when I can take medicare (not that I'm counting the days or anything...). So that means I have at least 25-28 years left to work before I can retire. Ugh. I can remember being a kid and I wanted to grow up, and now that I'm grown up, I want to get old and retire and act like a kid again. :p

I'm honestly not looking forward to getting old, though, not really. My grandparents made it look like not fun at all. My grandpa was very physically ill, and towards the end his mind started slipping (he lost the ability to do math, in particular - he used to do his own taxes every year, but the last few years of his life he couldn't even figure out how much to tip at a restaurant). And my grandma is mostly gone mentally and is now starting to become physically frail, too. I'm even seeing it in younger family members, my uncle is only 70 and he's got some dementia and is going downhill. So yeah, I'd like to retire but without all the downsides of getting older!
 
Hawkeye, they were BIG lobsters too! They were over 2.5 lbs each, one was almost 3 lbs! And yes, I ate the whole thing (hubby ate the larger one but I still ate my whole 2.5 lb lobster). Yum!

Fitness update: The weather wasn't super cooperative over the weekend. It was supposed to be not too warm, but it ended up being warmer than predicted. So as a result, I stayed in for the most part. I did a lot around the house - laundry, dishes, vacuuming, dusting, straightening up, gave the dog a bath, etc. So I was active, but I didn't walk nor take a bike ride.

Once again it's looking to be warm and rainy this week. I'll walk when I can. It poured rain overnight, we actually had some flooding here today, but the rain has stopped for now. If it's not raining in a few hours then I'll take a walk on my lunch hour today.

I've got a bike ride in mind for Sunday. There's a thing called Ride the Drive - I think a bunch of cities in the US do this, including mine. They shut down a bunch of streets downtown so that there's no car traffic, and everyone rides their bikes through the downtown streets. There are things like bands and food vendors and activities too. It's fun, I've done it in the past and I'm hoping the weather and my guts will allow me to do Ride the Drive this year too.
 
Ride the drive sounds like a great idea,I'd love it.I was awake all of last night due to Restless Leg Syndrom.I sat in the lounge rather that wake hubby.Nearly went mad.I wasn't well at the weekend but managed a couple of shortish walks.Just sat around reading today but the weather's not good.
 
Yes, Ride the Drive is great. They changed the streets that are closed off this year, so I think in years past it was about a 6 mile loop and now it's more like 4 miles and not really a loop anymore. So that's not great, although I'm a bit happy about it, because in the past there was a HUGE uphill on the 6 mile loop, and that's not part of the new 4 mile section of downtown. That hill always absolutely killed me, my legs and lungs were always just dead tired afterwards, so I'm pretty happy about not having to ride up that hill this year! I think I will miss being able to do the loop, though. It was nice just being able to hop in anywhere in the middle, do a loop, and not miss anything. Now it looks like it'll sort of be go down and back on one road, go down and back on another road, go down and back on a 3rd road. Well, the 3rd road leads to home anyway, so it's not too bad, but it's a bit of a bummer. A mixed bag I guess.

Was it perhaps something you ate that caused the restless leg syndrome to flare up? I know I always have much worse RLS when I'm flaring, it seems like if my potassium drops too low then my legs keep me up half the night (with, of course, my guts keeping me up the other half). Might also have something to do with low sodium too, I'm not sure. I hope you feel better tonight and can get some sleep!

It looks like it's just too warm again for me to walk today, hmph. I'm hoping it'll cool down by evening and maybe then I can walk Lily.
 
Oh, and Carol, you'll like this. That baby robin that I had befriended last week while doing yard work? I saw him 3 times over the weekend! And his mom was with him, I don't know where she was when I initially had picked him up and moved him out of our yard so that hubby could mow, but every time since, I've seen Birdie with his mom. :) He was in my front yard, then when I let Lily out to potty he was in my back yard, and then yesterday as we were heading out to go grocery shopping, he was sitting in my driveway. I had to gently coax him to leave the driveway so that we didn't squish him with the car! It's so cute, Birdie seems to know me and he likes hanging around. If I call out to him, he'll chirp back at me. I'm a regular disney princess! :p Ha ha.
 
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Ah,I love that.I hope he hangs around and maybe will feed off your hand.But they're very territorial so his parents might see him off soon.I know males will fight to the death in breeding season.We have gulls on a roof over the back.They've nested there for 30yrs that I know of.The young don't leave until 3mnths old.There are two this year and are wandering about the roof and testing their wings.They're adult size but still babes .We cared for one for a few weeks last year.If they fall onto the roads,they get squished because they can't get out of the way fast enough.This years seem to be ok so far.Hopefully they'll fly towards the river and not the opposite direction.Our shed needed fumigating last year what with raw fish and gull crap.Hubby made a little beach for him with sand and seaweed and a washing up bowl of water. hahaha But hopefully NOT AGAIN this year.
 
re: R.L.S.It's only the 4th or 5th time I've had it over the years but I've had it twice this last year.I've looked it up and I don't seem to be doing any thing to cause it.My mum used to mention she had it sometimes and I think it can be hereditary.I hope I never have it again.I slept good last night but am still sleepy.
And hills.If you go up you have to come down and vice versa.You do round here anyway.
I'd rather struggle up first and get it over with then I know I've got an easy ride back.
 
I'm not sure if our robins will fight to the death like that. I know there's a definite difference between British robins and American robins (they look quite different, they do both have red breasts but that's where the similarities end, and I think it's a totally different bird). I've never seen or heard of them fighting like that here. Some birds will get territorial for sure - we had a wren who nested in our yard one year, and although she was tiny, she was extremely fierce and loudly scolded anyone who got anywhere near her nest. But I don't think our robins will do that.

I didn't end up walking Lily yesterday evening as it was still too warm and humid out. Today I won't walk either. I'm feeling "off" today. My guts are okay but things just don't feel right, it's hard to describe. I slept wrong and I just feel "off", I'm slightly headachey and slightly dizzy and slightly nauseous but none of those things are actually enough to make me feel bad. But all combined it feels like my body is trying to tell me that something isn't right. It's more disconcerting than anything. So I'm going to play it safe and not do any exercise today. Which is fine because it's likely going to be too warm and maybe stormy again today. It's also looking to be very warm and stormy tomorrow too, so my goal now is to take a walk on Thursday. And hopefully I'll be feeling well by Sunday for Ride the Drive! I don't want to have to sit it out this year.
 
Aha, I think I've figured it out. I'm coming down with a cold. That would explain the headache and why I didn't sleep well. My sinuses are getting stuffy which would account for the slight dizziness, and whenever my immune system turns on to fight a cold or virus, it also attacks my guts a bit - that would account for the slight nausea.

That's not good for Ride the Drive, though. :( If I still have a cold when the weekend comes around, then I'll have to sit it out and rest instead. Bleh.
 
I know I feel much better in Spring/Autumn, even winter is preferable to muggy warm weather.I can never understand why people pay good money to go somewhere "hot" and lie on a beach all day.Spain is the place closest to the UK where all the kids go to get to get drunk and get up to all sorts of mischief,even the not so young.Retirees go and sit around drinking cheap alcohol and eating unhealthy food,and play bingo at night.I'm not a spoil sport and if they enjoy themselves,well that's good.It's just not for me.(or hubby,luckily)And having a chronic illness like ours,it would be silly eh?.I'm sorry you're feeling icky.Feel better soon.x
 
I've never been a "go sit on the beach" person myself either (you know me, I always have to be actively doing something, I don't just sit around!). Winter and summer are both a bit difficult for me. Summer heat and humidity can make my guts very unhappy, but winter cold and snow can make my joints ache, especially my arthritic hips. Last winter wasn't too bad, though, because it hardly snowed at all - we had a lot of rain and some ice, but very little actual snow. I don't recall my joints acting up too much at all last winter.

I went out and bought a bunch of vitamin c drops, so that I can hopefully fight off this cold. I also stopped at the thrift shop while I was out and found a super cute blue dress, with pockets (pockets are my favorite feature on a dress!). It's a name-brand designer dress and it fits me perfectly and looks gorgeous, and best part was it only cost me $5! It seriously might be my new favorite dress, I love it. So I had that to cheer me up today. And hopefully in a few days I'll be feeling better and can get back to walking and can still do my bike ride on Sunday.
 
Well, I've had an awful couple of days. Whenever I catch a cold or virus, my immune system turns on to fight the virus, but it also attacks my digestive system while it's on. And this time around has been one of the worst. I'm actually wondering if I caught the flu instead of a cold, that's how bad it's been. The abdominal pain has been horrendous and lots of bathroom trips, and I also had a sort-of fever last night which caused bad body aches, particularly in my lower back, and awful chills too. I took a shower that was borderline-scalding hot and I was still shivering. And I barely slept because of the back pain and the abdominal pain, I just could not get comfortable at all.

(I say a sort-of fever, because my normal body temp is in the mid 97s, and they always say that "normal" body temp is 98.6 degrees but that's not true for everybody. So my temp got up to 98.4 yesterday and my body acted as though that was a fever, because really it is a full degree higher than my normal so it is a fever for me, even though by medical definition it's not a fever.)

I think I'm doing a bit better today - the fever seems to be gone at least. I called in sick to work yesterday and today to rest and try to recover from this awfulness. I'm not going to walk until I'm completely over this, and I definitely will not do Ride the Drive. Ugh, oh well. That's what I get for trying to plan in advance with a chronic illness! :(
 
Aw that's a shame Cat,but you're being sensible staying put.We did a couple of hours on the bikes today but I found it hard work for some reason.It is quite warm out so that was probably it.I don't do well in warm weather as you know.Going out again tomorrow before the mad weekend.Not looking forward to the kids summer break,but it will pass.It always does.Then the xmas cards will start sneaking into the shops.hahaha Feel better soon.x
 
Hah, Carol, funny you should mention that. I was actually just organizing some things in my craft room, including cards, and I came across some xmas cards. :p Um, nope, definitely too early for those, no matter what the stores say!

I'm doing a lot better today than yesterday. My fever is gone so I'm no longer chilled nor achey. I just checked my temp and it was 96.4, which is a little low for me, but I'd rather it be low than high. I'm still having some abdominal pains here and there, but not nearly as bad nor as frequent as they were yesterday. I even have a little bit of my appetite back, but I don't quite trust it yet, so I'm eating very small amounts of very bland, safe foods for the time being. And my capacity to eat isn't anywhere close to normal anyway, I tried eating a bowl of cereal with almond milk earlier today and could only eat about half of it before I felt too full and a bit nauseous and had to stop. So I know I still have a ways to go before I'm recovered from this flu or virus or whatever it is, but I'm making good progress which is encouraging. I'm still going to skip Ride the Drive just to be safe. I'll probably go to work tomorrow - I think I'm feeling okay enough that I can make it through one day of work and then continue to rest and recover over the weekend. My dad suggested that we all go visit my grandma on Sunday afternoon, so I'm going to play it by ear and may or may not go depending on how I'm feeling. And of course I don't want her to catch whatever this is. So we'll see about that.

Hot weather affects me badly too as you know, so I'm sure that was at least partially the culprit in your ride being more difficult than usual. If I'm not hydrated well enough then that also can make a workout more difficult for me, and on a bike ride the wind can also be a killer. Even my choice of bicycle can do me in, nowadays I almost always ride my road bike because it's lighter. My cruiser bike is just too heavy for me I think.
 
I'm alive and did go to work today. Sometimes when you're feeling ill but not terribly ill, a distraction is good. So work is my distraction today, I've had a lot to catch up on. I'm still not feeling great, but I continue to improve. The abdominal pains are lesser and fewer, and I even had a fairly solid bowel movement this morning. Fever is still gone. Appetite and eating are not back on track yet though, I have a slight appetite but am still not able to eat very much without becoming nauseous. I also don't seem to have much thirst so I have to sort of force myself to drink or I find that I start to become dehydrated. That's not great. I'm thinking I might cancel my visit with my grandma on Sunday. I haven't decided for sure yet, but that's the direction I'm leaning in. That way I wouldn't get her sick and I could stay at home and rest some more. That sounds like the best plan right now. I'm going to decide for sure tomorrow and then will let my dad know. Fortunately he's the one person in my family who is actually supportive of me when I'm not feeling well. My dad is the one person who will ask me how I'm doing, and when I automatically say I'm fine (even if I'm not fine, I always just say I'm fine), he asks me, "No really, how are you, really?" He sees through the BS and the "I'm fine" mask that I put on every day. And he's the only one who does that. It's really odd to me that he's so supportive now that I'm an adult, because I really hated him when I was a kid. But that's another rant for another day.

Fitness-wise, obviously I'm going to continue to rest and have no plans to do anything active whatsoever. I know I need to heal and recover from this virus or whatever before I attempt to push my body in any way. So my weekend is looking like it's going to be crocheting and maybe some sewing. But hey, I've been getting a lot of crocheting done lately. :p I have been making a lot of hats lately, with the intention to give a few as gifts and donate the rest to a cancer hospital. I now have almost 3 full boxes full of hats! And also one box of scarves. I'm definitely making good progress at that, I am happy that I can crochet even when I'm not feeling well, and in turn do something nice for others. That makes me feel worthwhile on otherwise worthless days.
 
It always seems to be one step forward and two steps back doesn't it ? But I'm glad you're not pushing yourself and planning to rest over the weekend.I managed to get out again today on the bike.I really didn't feel like it but was glad I made the effort.I walked into town and back this morning for a few bits.We have friends coming on Sunday to go to the Life Boat summer fayre on the river so I wanted a few nibbles etc to have when they get here.Them and hubby might get fish and chips when we're out,depending on the length of the Queue.The forecast is for a hot spell and thunder storms next week.Make sure and have a restful weekend Cat,do what your body tells you.
 
I made a pretty quick recovery this time around. Guts are still a teeny tad bit grumbly, but about 95% better than they were. As you may have seen in the LOW thread, I went out and bought a new (well, used) car today. That was very exciting! So I am planning to go visit my grandma tomorrow, I'm feeling quite well and up for it and I don't think I'm contagious anymore as I had initially come down with this virus on Tuesday. And my parents want to see my new car, ha ha. :p I'm sure my grandma will be excited for me too although she'll forget all about it 30 seconds later. Oh well.

I was fairly active after getting home from our car buying adventure. Hubby worked on the new car (he put new brake pads on it) while I worked in the yard, then we had a nice dinner. My eating still isn't quite back to normal yet, I think my stomach shrank from not eating hardly anything for a few days there, so I didn't eat much dinner but I felt quite full. Hubby did eat a lot. So we decided to walk off the fullness, and we took Lily for a long walk through the park. That was very nice. I'll take it easier tomorrow, my only plans are to visit my grandma in the afternoon, so I can sleep in and relax all morning.
 
Well that was a good day !!! It rained yesterday so I had a lazy day (another one hahaha)
We have old friends coming today for a walk down to the river for the life boat summer fayre.It's very warm.I was just about to do some ironing and popped out in perspiration,so changed my mind.Safe driving......you haven't mention work worries recently ?
 
I am still having work worries, but for the time being things seem reasonably stable, so I decided that now is the time to buy a car (it was used, and it didn't eat up all of my savings and I paid 100% in full, so no car payments). They are closing 3 of the branch offices at work but not our office, at least not yet anyway. So for the time being, we're all focused on those 3 offices that are closing - they actually said they don't want to lay off anyone at this time, so we're all working on helping relocate those staff to other branch offices. The offices will close at the end of August, so I feel like I'm reasonably safe at least until then. So in the meantime I'm going to focus on making money and saving money to replenish some of what we did spend on the car. And I figure if I do get let go, I will need reliable transportation to get me to job interviews etc - my old car was becoming louder and quirkier and not as reliable as she had been in years past. It was a bit of a risky gamble to buy a newer car, but not too risky. I tend to play it safe, and it seemed like a pretty safe thing to do. If my old car had died and left me stuck, I'd have needed to scramble to find a new car. By buying a newer car before my old car died, I avoid that emergency situation and have much better control over the situation. So I think it'll all be okay! :)
 
I would say I'm still not quite up to par after that virus last week - my eating and bowels are still just slightly off. I still can't seem to eat very much, and my stools were a bit loose (then yesterday I took a Zofran so now I'm a bit backed up). I feel mostly well, just a teeny bit of recovering left to do.

I did end up visiting my grandma yesterday. It was mostly a good visit although she got snippy a few times. I know that's the dementia and not her. It's still difficult to watch her decline, though. After I got home, I had to do my chores. We were so busy on Saturday with car stuff that I hadn't done my usual weekend chores yet. So I quickly took out the garbage and vacuumed while hubby did dishes and straightened up. We also went grocery shopping and had to stop at the pet store. I got some praying mantises and I had to get them some food (live crickets). So yesterday was busy because of the visit and the chores. I didn't end up walking Lily, but I was pretty active otherwise.

I'm hoping to walk Lily tonight after work. Today is looking like the one nice day this week. After this, it's going to get hotter out again and rainy off and on too. So I'll do what I can when I can. Pred-wise, I'm planning to taper on Friday. I'm feeling okay aside from the last little lingering symptoms from the virus, so hopefully my taper will go okay (knock on wood).

My new car is great! I'm thinking I might even be able to fit my bicycle in it. The car is a hatchback and I've laid down the back seat to get more cargo space. I can also at least partially lay down the front passenger seat. So at some point soon I'm going to test it out. If I can fit my bike in then I can take it to new places to ride, not just areas within a few miles of my house. That will open up whole new adventures for me. Hubby's having friends over on Saturday, so if the weather is nice on Saturday and if I can fit my bike in, I might take it somewhere new to ride. Possibly on the forest path! There's a lot of paved path and it's open to both cyclists and walkers (no cars). I'm excited about that possibility.
 
I did walk Lily last night. It was slightly too warm and the mosquitoes were out, but overall it was a good walk. Today it's way too warm and humid to do much of anything, and we're supposedly getting storms this evening, ugh. That's how the rest of the week is looking, too. Not ideal. It's looking like Sunday will be the first not too warm nor stormy day. I still want to go out and do something on Saturday, so we'll see if I'm able to have an adventure or if the weather keeps me inside.
 
It was v.warm here at the weekend but we enjoyed our friends visit.Been cycling Mon.& Tues. as it was cooler at the coast.It's overcast today and thundery showers are a maybe,so not sure whether or not to cycle or hit the auction.Praying Mantis' sound interesting.They wont take much exercising hahaha.We have tropical fish indoors and goldfish out back.They started off as little tiddlers and just got bigger.After having to buy three tanks to accommodate them it was cheaper to put them outdoors.Glad you got to visit Gran and I'm sure you know she doesn't mean to be snappy.Count to ten before you reply.(she'll probably forget what she said by then) Love the car......
 
Fitness is on hold indefinitely. My walking partner is very sick. :( Lily had to have emergency surgery last night, and she more likely than not has cancer. I wrote a much longer post about it in the LOW thread. I'm devastated and so worried right now.
 
Lily is home from the emergency vet. She's on restricted movement for 2 weeks, so no walking with her for at least that long. After that time, her staples come out and then she can start taking short (like 5 min) walks. I'm still so worried for her - no pathology results yet but she most likely has cancer. But I'm also so happy that she's home.
 
Lily officially gets her staples out on Aug 2nd. I'm hoping she'll be feeling well enough on that day to have a short walk. And by then I should know her test results, so if she is feeling up for a walk but if it's positive for cancer, then maybe we'll walk around the pet store and pick out some treats and toys. I'm also going to buy her some ground beef tonight to cook up for her dinner. She needs a lot of pampering right now.
 
I know how hard this is for you Cat,it's just horrible.That's why we won't have another, dog,well the main reason really.Even when I see an oldie out for a walk,I get heart ache,knowing what it's owners have to face soon.Alfie was dx'd with lymphoma at first and the vet phoned us while we were on holiday in our caravan.Kind of spoiled it for us,but Alf was unaware and he enjoyed himself.We had him for an extra 3 years,but it was always on our mind.That's the trouble with dogs,their live span is to short and no matter how many years they have, there comes the time when we have to say our last goodbye.It's the last kind thing we do for them.Please try and stay well Cat.Sending hugs.
 
Thanks Carol. Lily isn't even particularly old - she's only 8, and corgis can live to be 15. But if she does end up having cancer, I read that the type she likely has tends to affect large breed dogs aged 8 to 10. Corgis, surprisingly, are considered a large breed. She's short but she has a large chest and torso. So yeah, she fits the type and the age - large breed, age 8. But, I did read something encouraging yesterday. It said that the larger the tumor, the more likely it is to be benign. Apparently the biggest ones are more often benign. I'm not sure exactly how big her mass was, but the vet described it as being very large. So I've got a bit of hope. Still waiting on those pathology results to be sure, though. I'm going to call them this afternoon if they don't call me before then.

Wow, I'm glad you got another 3 years with him, that's quite good. They told me, and my googling confirms, that if Lily does have cancer (hemangiosarcoma), that she'll have about 3 months left. It's apparently a very fast-growing and aggressive cancer. I'm still on pins & needles waiting for those results. I had to ask my GP to refill my anti-anxiety medication (lorazepam) because it's been such a challenging time lately, I've been so anxious and crying a lot and not sleeping well ever since Lily got sick. I'm trying to take care of myself but it's hard. I do have a weekend of doing nothing planned - I'm just going to stay at home, take care of Lily, watch movies, maybe do some sewing. Hubby was going to have friends over but I told him I don't want people in my house, so his friends are getting together elsewhere. I also canceled plans the following weekend, a friend of mine was going to come over but I asked her if we could reschedule and she totally understood. So yeah, I'm going to rest and relax and take care of Lily and that's it.
 
I wrote a little more in LOW, but long story short - I got Lily's test results back just now, and it is cancer. It's metastatic, it's already spread to at least one other organ. She probably has a few months left at best. I'm so, so upset.
 
Cat-a-Tonic said:
I wrote a little more in LOW, but long story short - I got Lily's test results back just now, and it is cancer. It's metastatic, it's already spread to at least one other organ. She probably has a few months left at best. I'm so, so upset.
Click to expand...

I am so sorry to hear that it's bad news. Sending hugs your way. :(
 
Ah,Cat.I don't know what to say that hasn't already been said by all our crohnie family.
Shoulders back and deep breathes.Don't let her see your distress,let this be a happy time for her.Sending hugs.
 
She's seen my distress plenty, I cry easily and I have a soft spot for animals anyway, so when it's my own animal in distress I turn into a big mess of ugly crying. I am trying my best to make this a good time for Lily, though. She is manipulating me for all that's worth, too. :p She's a very smart dog and very food-motivated. I had been giving her cooked hamburger and a little bit of her kibble. Well, she decided she didn't want her kibbble, and then she didn't want hamburger either. She only wanted treats. So, I gave her a bunch of treats and she was happy as a clam about that. She's dying of cancer so we've decided she can eat whatever she wants. If she just wants treats then I guess she can just have treats. I won't say no to my dying dog. Especially after Saturday - she started having seizures that day. She's on anti-seizure meds now and seems to be doing okay, but that's two days within the last week that we had to rush her to the emergency vet. So she can have all the treats she wants, and next time we have to rush to the emergency vet, hubby and I are thinking that it will probably be time to put her down (the seizures likely mean that the cancer has already spread to her brain, so she's pretty far gone already). It's been so hard, but we don't want her to suffer. In the meantime, lots of treats for Lily. :)

(I should add that her treats are actually dog food - for years we've bought the high end "soft" kibble - I think it's called Moist & Meaty - and have given her that as a treat. So really it technically is dog food. We also bought some steak yesterday and are going to see if she's interested in eating that.)

I actually have a fitness update! Some of the equipment at hubby's workplace broke down, so everyone got sent home today. So, he's at home looking after Lily. I have been planning to spend every lunch hour going home to check on her, let her out to potty, give her treats, etc. But today he's home, so I don't necessarily have to go home on my lunch today. And the weather looks really ideal for walking. It's going to be about 75 degrees and a bit overcast, so not too warm, but not rainy either. And I desperately need some stress relief and just to collect my thoughts and be by myself in the forest for a little while. So that's the plan, I will head to the forest path for a much-needed walk on my lunch today. I'm really, really looking forward to that.

Part of me feels guilty for not spending every available minute with Lily, but I know I need to take care of myself too. I have not been taking care of myself very well since she got sick last week. I've been so worried about her that my stomach has been a mess with nausea and pain. I've had very little appetite and I've lost about 4 lbs. So me taking a walk is the first step towards taking better care of myself during this extremely challenging time. I'm going to attempt to eat more/better starting today as well.
 
I didn't want to look at your posts in case there was bad news and sighed with relief that things are ok so far.Nothing we say is going to make things easier so I won't rabbit on.You know how we all feel.It's a good idea trying to have some time to yourself when you can.Could Lily manage a little walk ? Maybe you could take her in the car to the park for a short while.You know best of course.Chin up,try to be strong.
 
Lily can't really walk very well right now and is also not supposed to walk right now, so doubly no, unfortunately. If she makes it past next week Wednesday then hopefully I can try taking her on a very short walk. She gets her staples out from her incision from surgery next week Wednesday, and we were instructed to limit her mobility until then so that she doesn't pull out a staple or re-open her incision. And, the anti-seizure medication has made her very wobbly, to the point that she is having a hard time walking. She's very, very unsteady on her feet and they sort of slip or collapse out from under her at times. When she goes outside to go potty, I have to help her down the 2 small steps by our door, and then I have to hold her up while she does her business as her legs sometimes sort of collapse out from under her. But, the vet did say that she should acclimate more to the medicine over time, and it's only been since Saturday that she's been on the anti-seizure meds (she got her loading doses on Saturday after her initial two seizures). So hopefully with each day that passes, she'll be a little more steady on her feet, and maybe once her staples are out then we can try a very short, slow walk to see how she does. I was thinking I'd take her in the car to the pet store and walk her around in the store, and she can pick out whatever treats and toys she wants.

Speaking of the car, even my new car is making me depressed. I purposely got a hatchback instead of a sedan (my old car was a sedan), so that I could just pop open the back hatch and put Lily in and go off on some adventures (hiking, etc). It was supposed to be an adventure car for us. And soon there's going to be no Lily, and certainly for the moment she is not up for having any adventures. I know I can still take my new car on adventures by myself or with hubby, but it won't be quite the same without Lily.

My co-workers are amazing. There are a couple of ladies at work that I'm friendly with who were both on vacation last week, so I caught them both up on what's been happening with Lily. And they are both so kind and supportive. They gave me their phone #s and told me to call them anytime I need to talk. I also said I'm nervous about this upcoming weekend - hubby has to go out of town for work again from Fri - Sun, so it'll just be me and Lily, and if something happens, it'll be me by myself making the call on whether or not to put her down, which would be horrible. So my two friends at work said they would come with me if I need them to, if the worst should happen this weekend. That was so kind of them. They've both lost pets recently themselves (one lost her dog and the other lost her cat) so they know what I'm going through. It's nice to know that I have supportive people who are willing to help me out in such a horrible situation.

I'm going to have my walk soon. It looks beautiful outside. I'm going to put on my headphones and listen to my music and breathe in the forest air and let go of some of my worry and stress. Obviously I have more than enough worry and stress to go around, but I'm going to try to let go as much as I can.
 
My walk yesterday was great. The weather was nice and it made me feel better. I don't feel as stressed or worried as I was. I'm still of course worried about Lily, but not to the point that there's a pit of pain in my stomach like there's been. So that's improvement. I'm going to try to walk more when I can. I do need to go home on my lunch break most days though, to feed her and let her out to potty and generally check on her, so I'm not sure exactly when I'll be able to exercise.

She's doing well, fortunately. (As well as a dog with terminal metastatic cancer can be, anyway.) Still no further seizures. Her appetite is good. She didn't want to eat kibble or hamburger the other day, but she's eaten a ton of treats, steak, and some carrots. Poor thing, her anti-seizure medicine makes her very unsteady on her feet, sometimes her feet just slip out from under her and she falls over, especially when she's excited. She got very excited about eating a carrot this morning and was trying to run towards me and fell. I was like, it's okay, just lie there and I'll bring the carrot to you! So she laid there and ate her carrot. :) She's such a good dog.
 
Ah bless her....at least she hasn't got far to fall.Good that she's eating no matter what it is.I'm glad you found walking eased your stress a wee bit.Like I've told we had Alf for an extra three years after his mis-diagnosis of lymphoma (Joey's dx)He did have cushings and it was me who told the vet.(thankyou internet)It was like the "sword of Damacles" hanging over our heads,but he and we, had a good three years mostly.Even dogs and pets who live their full life span without illness will depend on us to make the decision for them when it's time.....Did an 8ml cycle today.Too many people about though.
 
Carol, I'm glad you had Alfie for so long after his mis-diagnosis, but how horrible to get a cancer diagnosis when that wasn't really it! :( I'm glad you could figure it out though. I'm quite confident that, unfortunately, Lily's diagnosis is accurate. I did some reading about spleen tumors (hemangiosarcoma) in dogs, and they may as well have written those articles specifically about Lily because all of her symptoms fit perfectly. And they did pathology on the tumor that they took out of Lily - they looked at it under a microscope and confirmed that it is definitely cancer. I wish it was a mis-diagnosis for her, but I know it's cancer and we're just taking it day by day. I know tomorrow isn't guaranteed for her. Heck, a minute from now isn't guaranteed for her. So I'm just going to try to enjoy every minute that we do have with her while she's still feeling okay and not suffering in any way.

Lily seems to be doing okay for the most part today. She's a little less wobbly which is good. She's been drinking a lot more water - she started drinking more right after her surgery, and then a few days later when the vet put her on the anti-seizure med, she said that makes dogs drink more too. So she's been drinking a LOT of water lately. That's one of the reasons that I'm now going home every day on my lunch hour, because she can no longer hold her bladder for 8 hours while hubby and I are at work (she can't even seem to hold it for 8 hours while we all sleep - she was whining at 4 AM today to be let out to potty, fortunately hubby is an early riser so he got up and let me sleep). We put a puppy pee pad in her crate just in case she has an accident, and it looked like there was a bit of urine on the pad when I went home today to check on her. So she got a fresh pad and I took her out twice to make sure she was as empty as possible before I headed back to work. She peed twice and pooped 4 times in the 30 minutes that I was home! But, like I said, she's been drinking a lot, and she's eating a lot as well as long as it's the food she wants to eat. She'll eat her treats, and steak, and carrots as long as I keep putting them in front of her. The sad part is, she was quite overweight when we got her. She was 50 lbs and she's supposed to be about 35 lbs at the most. So over the years we've been getting her to lose a couple lbs per year. She just got down to 36 lbs as of the day of her surgery when the vet weighed her, so she was so close to her ideal weight - and now we don't care, we're just happy that she's eating and we'll feed her whatever she wants to eat. All that time and effort to get her weight down and now it's all for naught. Oh well.

Fitness-wise - the weather is actually quite nice out, it's not too warm at all, it's almost jacket weather. It might be really nice weather for a bike ride this evening. I'm thinking about going home, taking care of Lily's food and water and potty needs, and then maybe hopping on my bike for a short ride. I feel a little bit guilty about not spending every available minute with Lily, but I need to take care of myself too, and fitness needs to be a part of that equation. And, she'll get her dose of anti-seizure meds with her dinner, and that makes her drowsy. So she'll probably just nap anyway while I'm on my bike ride. So, that's the tentative plan.
 
I think that's good that she's going to the loo plenty.Far better out than in.And what does it matter if she has an accident in the house.It doesn't now,but of course she will probably feel ashamed so it's good that you can get home at lunchtime.As to taking care of yourself.Of course it's important,but you can't spread yourself to thinly.You have Lily and work and a house to run,so don't push yourself to hard.It's not good for you.You need to be well to care for your little girl
 
I had a good bike ride yesterday evening. I needed that more than I even thought I did. I only went about 5 or 6 miles. I rode past the dog park, and I saw one of our usual group of friends (there are a few of us humans who often meet up together there with our dogs). I had been hoping to see my neighbor who has 2 corgis - they are Lily's best friends. I didn't see her, but I saw another lady from our group, so I stopped my bike and told her that she probably won't see me at the dog park again, or for a long time at least, because Lily is dying of terminal cancer. This lady was very sympathetic. And, she had my corgi neighbor's phone number. So I got that although I haven't called her yet. It's funny, the dog park is such that most people just know the dogs' names. I know some of the humans' first names but none of their last names and none of their phone numbers. It's always all about the dogs. So anyway, it was nice talking with her, I felt like I needed to inform the dog park group about Lily, and she's going to tell the others when she sees them so that everybody knows why Lily and I don't come to the dog park anymore. (Although I am going to buy a wagon, and hopefully if she's having a good day at some point after she gets her staples out, I can cart her to the park for a final visit or two.)

After that, I rode hard and fast away from the direction that my dying dog was in. I kind of just wanted to ride away from the fact that she's dying, but I know I can't run away from reality. I felt really emotional but also drained, like I'm sick of having so many emotions, and I started to get angry about it. A cyclist passed me at one point, and he said, "Nice day for a ride" and I really wanted to reply, "F* you!" I had such anger out of nowhere. I'm angry that my dog is dying. I'm really angry! Somehow I went from sadness straight to anger. I don't know if that's progress? I know both are part of the grief process, and I guess I'm already grieving because I know she's dying, but she's still alive so I feel a bit weird. Like, I don't want her to see me sad or angry. So I guess when I got away from her on my bike, it all came out and I nearly took my anger out on another cyclist (who didn't deserve it, and I did manage to keep my mouth shut).

So yeah. I think I need to do more fitness out of the house/away from Lily in the upcoming days & weeks, because it seems to help me at least start to process my feelings. It's therapeutic. Unfortunately, more rain storms are coming this afternoon/evening, so I don't think I can get away for outdoor fitness tonight. Hopefully tomorrow.
 
I know exactly how you feel about feeling angry Cat , at first I was in the verge of crying all the time ,
the day before yesterday nearly lost it with a driver that cut me off ,
It seems funny for me to be going through the stages of grieving esp when Joey is still alive ,
hopefully you are feeling better after the cycle and that Lily is still stable and recovering from her surgery .
 
I wrote a long response and then the forum had an error message and ate my reply, ugh. So here's the short version Tony, I'm sorry to hear you're also in the anger phase, but it's good in a way to know that I'm not alone. Not that I would ever want anybody else to go through this, it's absolutely terrible that we're both in this same boat, but at least we can support each other through it. I don't feel like the anger phase is any easier than the crying phase - I'm still full of lots of emotions that I'm having a hard time dealing with. Lily is recovering well from her surgery, the staples on her incision come out one week from today. I just ordered online a soft cloth wagon for Lily. I'm going to put blankets & cushions in it so that it's nice and comfortable, and then when her staples are out I can put her in the wagon and take her on a few more trips to the dog park, if she's feeling up to it.
 
I'm even more angry now. In talking with my hubby last night, I told him that I've reached the anger stage. He told me he's already hit acceptance, and that every day that we have with Lily now is "frosting on the cake". That just made me more angry! It's only been like 9 days since she got sick! How can he already have hit acceptance?? She's still alive FFS, he can't have hit acceptance yet. Meanwhile I'm over here, angrier than ever about how unfair it is that my dog has cancer. Resentful of my friends who have healthy dogs. And just mad at life in general for being so crappy sometimes. Ugh ugh ugh.

I guess that's just how hubby is, though. Like, if there's a cold going around and we both catch it - he'll be sick for half a day and then be fine. Meanwhile I'll be sick for like 3 weeks. So I guess he's like that mentally too, he can bounce back from just about anything very quickly it seems. He cries for a few days and then he's fine. Meanwhile I cry for a few days, get angry, want to punch things, cry some more, repeat, repeat, repeat...

I didn't do any fitness things yesterday because we had some pretty torrential rains. Some of the streets were flooded and I had to find alternate streets to drive on just to get home from work yesterday. Then I got my umbrella and galoshes just to take Lily out to potty once I was home. Fortunately though it's looking like it's not going to rain again for at least a little while. I don't know if or when I'm going to do more fitness things. I'm still full of angry emotions and I know I should find an outlet for them or they're going to come out at inappropriate times. But I also don't feel like doing much. So we'll see.

Oh, and get this. So I've been posting a lot about Lily's deteriorating health on facebook. Hubby's mother is on facebook so presumably she's seen at least some of my posts, and I know that hubby has told her on the phone that our dog has cancer. So I know she knows. She and hubby's father are renting some cabin somewhere next month and they want us to come up there for a "vacation" (staying with my in-laws does not sound like a vacation to me!). I didn't want to go anyway, especially since we found out that hubby's sister is bringing her 5 rambunctious kids up there for basically the whole "vacation". (That sounds even worse to me!) So we're not going. But hubby's mom still wants us to come. And I'm like, you do know that my dog is dying, right? I'm not leaving her in the care of others and I'm also not driving her several hours away from her vet. I'm just not doing that. But they don't seem to understand why we aren't coming, and hubby's mom told hubby that she wants to call him to discuss the "vacation". It's like, seriously? I don't want to vacation with my in-laws, I don't want to vacation with a pile of kids, and my dog is dying. Are those really not enough reasons for someone to understand why I don't want to go? Ugh! Do not impose your weird crummy "vacation" on me! It's not happening! (There's that anger again.)
 
Hey Cat a lot of older people (Im not old 57 [emoji4]) don't

see dogs the way we do now ,
our pets are part of the family and they don't understand that ,
Its hard to have to put up with in laws and even worse their children at a time like this ,
Best thing is to be straight out and tell them No ,
If they don't like it thats their problem
Every day with Lily is precious to her and even more so to you ,
Just back from the vet with Joey and she was very surprised at the reduced size of the lumps on his neck ,hopefully we will have a few more weeks with him ,
hope Lily is doing well .
 
I'm glad Joey is doing reasonably okay, and I hope you do get at least a few more good weeks with him. Yes, she definitely is my family. I don't have kids, so my hubby and my dog and cat are my family. And I like my pets much more than I like my in-laws! I don't think my in-laws have ever much liked me either though. When hubby and I got engaged, we announced it first to my parents and they were very happy and called hubby "son" and hugged us and all that. But then when we announced our engagement to hubby's parents, they were watching TV, and they were like, "Huh, you're engaged. Oh. Okay. Tell us more at the commercial." And they went back to watching TV. So yeah, I've never been close with them anyway. I don't care if they think less of me if hubby and I don't go along on this stupid "vacation." My dog is my priority.

Lily is doing okay. She's been a bit lethargic, but I'm sure that's because her medicine is still making her drowsy. She's still a bit wobbly too but that's improving every day. She's eating well. Hubby gave her steak and carrots for breakfast this morning, and we noticed something funny - she ate her carrots first! I think she likes carrots better than steak. :p What a silly girl she is.

You're right, 57 is not old! I'm 37 so I know I'm fairly young still. My grandma is 85 and has dementia. Every time she asks me how old she is, and I tell her she's 85, she's like, "Wow! That's old!" And then she asks my dad how old he is, and he says he's 64, and she again says, "Wow! You're old!" And she repeats that with me when I say I'm 37. :p So I think age is just a perspective thing anyway, since my grandma seems surprised at how old every single person is, regardless of their actual age.
 
Lily is still eating well and seems to be feeling reasonably well. But, I was petting her yesterday evening, and I found a new lump. :( It's on her ribcage in the right armpit area - I'm guessing it's a lymph node? She doesn't have a lump in the left armpit area, only on the right side, I kept checking both sides to make sure I wasn't imagining things. It seems like her cancer is really spreading fast, which makes sense because hemangiosarcoma is an aggressive and fast-spreading cancer in dogs. But it sucks, a lot. I have mostly left the anger phase and went right back to depression & crying. After I found the lump last night, I went into the shower and just cried. I'm losing my dog so quickly. When they said that average survival rate with this cancer is 3 months, I sort of assumed I'd have 3 months with her. But it's only been 1 week since her diagnosis of cancer, and we've learned that it's already spread to probably 3 new spots at least - it started in the spleen, the vets confirmed that the cancer spread to the omentum (the fatty layer that covers the intestines), they think it spread to the brain hence the seizures, and now my guess is that it's spread to the lymph nodes too. With all of this happening, there's no way she's got 3 months left. I'd be surprised if she has one month left.

I was thinking about taking a bike ride tomorrow morning. But since I went back to the crying phase, my guts went back to feeling unhappy (they were not happy for the whole time that I was previously in the crying phase). I'm right back to nausea, no appetite, and some abdominal pain. So I don't know if a bike ride is wise. Probably not. I'll see how I'm feeling tomorrow, but it's looking like the plan is to rest when I'm in the crying phase and exercise when I'm in the anger phase. My guts feel better when I'm in the anger phase, but I also feel like I want to swear at and punch everybody, so I need an outlet for that, which is exercise. But right now, in the crying phase, I just need to get through it.

I'm exhausted too and I can't sleep in. Lily's been waking up at about 4 AM every day lately because she has to urgently go potty, she can't hold her bladder for longer than that even though we take her out to go potty right at bedtime (10 PM). Hubby is going out of town this morning and won't be back until Sunday night, he and his boss have an event they're going to go work at which is several hours away. So it's just me and Lily. I don't want anything bad to happen this weekend, but I'm also mentally preparing myself in case I do have to have her put down (hubby has told me to do what needs to be done and not to wait for him to get home if that situation should occur). My mom and brother are coming down for a visit tomorrow, so at least I won't be alone the whole time. And I have several friends on standby who have offered to come with me if I do need to take Lily in to be put down. Just thinking about that makes me cry, I have some good supportive people in my life. But I'm still slightly terrified about being alone with hubby so far away all weekend. I'm just going to do my best to take care of Lily and myself and get through it. And hopefully she'll be okay all weekend and I won't have to do the difficult thing without hubby.

So yeah. I see some naps in my future this weekend. And probably a lot of resting, watching movies, crocheting, maybe some sewing. I don't really have any spending money since we spent so much on vet bills, so I'll likely mostly stay in, and will go on a bike ride if I'm feeling up for it.
 
Thats a lymph node all right Cat ,Joey has lumps there as well , allI can say is that I'm thinking of you and Lily and sending prayers and good thoughts and strength to help ye through this .
 
Thank you Tony. I'm sending you and Joey hugs and happy thoughts as well. It's so, so difficult going through this (and watching our furry friends go through this). I hope both of us and our animals can have a calm, peaceful, pain-free, symptom-free, good weekend.
 
No fitness updates today. I didn't do anything very active over the weekend aside from some chores around the house (I took out the garbage, did some laundry, etc). Since we've spent so much money lately on vet bills, I stayed in and didn't spend any money. I did a bunch of sewing (I already have plenty of fabric and patterns, so didn't need to buy a thing). My mom and brother came over and they took me out to lunch, and said their goodbyes to Lily. And on Sunday, my neighbor with 2 corgis (Lily's 2 best friends) came over with her dogs so that Lily could see them a last time before she goes. I don't think Lily has got much time left. I don't think she's in pain, but she doesn't seem totally comfortable or content, either. She's been sighing heavily when she lies down. She's also having diarrhea. She just sounds and looks tired and like she's close to being done, I think. She'll see the vet again on Wednesday, she gets her staples out on that day. I'm going to ask the vet about the lymph nodes. I have a feeling the cancer is spreading a lot and I'd like to hear the vet's opinion on that.

I'm also still exhausted. I got up at 4 AM both weekend days to let Lily out to potty, since I know she can't hold it for 8 hours anymore. I also ended up waking up at about 2:45 this morning and let her out and then had trouble falling back to sleep. The sleep disruptions plus the stress and sadness over the fact that my dog is dying has really fatigued me.

So yeah, I mostly stayed in and sewed. I made myself a cute oversized fleece hoodie - it's so warm! And I started making a cute top with this fabric I got a little while ago, it's teal green with cute birds on it. Didn't finish that one yet but got all the pieces cut out from the pattern. Sewing is good, it distracts me from things. And I need distractions right now. I have a feeling that a lot more sewing is in my near future.

The weather this week is looking like it'll be nice. I'm hoping to take a walk and a bike ride this week. Not sure when just yet. I have to play things by ear because I'm not sure how Lily will be doing on any given day (or any given hour, minute...).
 
Cat-a-Tonic said:
I don't think Lily has got much time left. I don't think she's in pain, but she doesn't seem totally comfortable or content, either. She's been sighing heavily when she lies down. She's also having diarrhea. She just sounds and looks tired and like she's close to being done, I think. She'll see the vet again on Wednesday, she gets her staples out on that day. I'm going to ask the vet about the lymph nodes. I have a feeling the cancer is spreading a lot and I'd like to hear the vet's opinion on that.
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Unfortunately, that's how we knew our dog needed to be put down. She was miserable and nothing that we were doing was of any help. Of course, it's not an easy decision by any means, but we knew that she would go on our terms and we could be with her at the end. She was going blind and deaf and her pain level was intolerable. She was having many accidents in the house, too, because she couldn't control her bowels anymore and her quality of life was poor. It's a personal decision that only you can make. We were glad that our dog was relieved of her suffering, but it's also hard to take in that she was gone. The house felt so empty for a month until we got another dog at my insistence (I have never been able to be without a dog for long and it was very hard for me). Our current dog could never replace the former one, but it's nice to have a dog in the house. :)
 
It sounds like it was time for your dog, I'm sorry you had to go through that. Lily isn't quite there yet. She's not having accidents in the house, she's having diarrhea but so far it's all outside in the yard (I am letting her out to potty every few hours and she lets me know if she needs to go out urgently). And she's still very interested in food and treats - she perks right up when I just say the word "treat". And I don't think she's in pain, she's more just lethargic and she knows there's something going on and she's not feeling like her usual self. So I know it's not quite time yet. But the time is coming, very soon. I know I will have to give myself at least a few months at least, if not maybe a year or more, once she's gone, before I get another dog. I've entertained the idea of maybe getting a new dog soon, but I know I can't do that. When I think of it, my first thought is, I don't want another dog - I want MY dog! I want Lily! But, Lily is dying. So I think I will need to fully deal with that first before I do anything about getting or fostering another dog. When I'm ready, which might not be for a long time, then I'm planning to foster to ease myself back into things without a commitment right away. In the meantime I'm going to give my cat so many cuddles and catnip and treats. (My cat is 14 but healthy, hopefully she has at least a few years left.)

I think part of it is that Lily is still reasonably young (she's only 8) and she's only been sick for just shy of 2 weeks. Prior to the Tuesday before last, she was a healthy, normal dog. She got so sick so suddenly. I feel like I'm still a bit in denial maybe, because it's still hard to wrap my head around. She's my hiking buddy, we go on adventures together. And now she's dying. My brain can't quite work out how that happened. We should be going on hikes, not thinking about cremation.

But, I am thinking about cremation. I ordered online a small pendant in which a small amount of ashes can be put into. I'm going to put a bit of Lily's ashes in the pendant, so that she can still go on hikes with me. I think I'm going to scatter the rest of her ashes at my grandpa's grave, because they were good buddies. He really loved Lily. I'm almost glad that he's gone, because he would have died of heartbreak if he knew Lily was dying of cancer. I like the idea of the two of them being laid to rest together.

Tony, how's Joey doing? Give him some treats and pats for me.
 
Hey Cat Joeys not too bad , he's getting spoilt rotten , we went into a friend s home tonight and he had a big portion of lasagna ready for Joey which he demolished very quickly ,
The worst part is that he seems fed up a lot of the time, thats hard to see when you are used to this 24/7
but he still gets a little exited for most human food which is nice ,
saying prayers and positive thoughts for Lily snd yourself .
 
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Cat-a-Tonic said:
It sounds like it was time for your dog, I'm sorry you had to go through that. Lily isn't quite there yet. She's not having accidents in the house, she's having diarrhea but so far it's all outside in the yard (I am letting her out to potty every few hours and she lets me know if she needs to go out urgently). And she's still very interested in food and treats - she perks right up when I just say the word "treat". And I don't think she's in pain, she's more just lethargic and she knows there's something going on and she's not feeling like her usual self. So I know it's not quite time yet. But the time is coming, very soon. I know I will have to give myself at least a few months at least, if not maybe a year or more, once she's gone, before I get another dog. I've entertained the idea of maybe getting a new dog soon, but I know I can't do that. When I think of it, my first thought is, I don't want another dog - I want MY dog! I want Lily! But, Lily is dying. So I think I will need to fully deal with that first before I do anything about getting or fostering another dog. When I'm ready, which might not be for a long time, then I'm planning to foster to ease myself back into things without a commitment right away. In the meantime I'm going to give my cat so many cuddles and catnip and treats. (My cat is 14 but healthy, hopefully she has at least a few years left.)

I think part of it is that Lily is still reasonably young (she's only 8) and she's only been sick for just shy of 2 weeks. Prior to the Tuesday before last, she was a healthy, normal dog. She got so sick so suddenly. I feel like I'm still a bit in denial maybe, because it's still hard to wrap my head around. She's my hiking buddy, we go on adventures together. And now she's dying. My brain can't quite work out how that happened. We should be going on hikes, not thinking about cremation.

But, I am thinking about cremation. I ordered online a small pendant in which a small amount of ashes can be put into. I'm going to put a bit of Lily's ashes in the pendant, so that she can still go on hikes with me. I think I'm going to scatter the rest of her ashes at my grandpa's grave, because they were good buddies. He really loved Lily. I'm almost glad that he's gone, because he would have died of heartbreak if he knew Lily was dying of cancer. I like the idea of the two of them being laid to rest together.

Tony, how's Joey doing? Give him some treats and pats for me.
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Yes, you will know. Dogs have a special way of telling us they are ready. Ours was actually telling us for at least a week but we couldn't let her go just yet. She wasn't eating or anything and was sleeping all the time. It's good that Lily is still interested in food and treats. That's a good sign! I agree that she's not there yet. I hope you get to spend a lot of time with her while she's still able to enjoy things. Even though she may be sick, this is the most precious time. I will never forget our dog. I miss her all the time and made a photo album of pictures with her in it and I still cry sometimes when I think about her (I think I just made myself tear up :cry:). We got her right before I was diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and PTSD so I leaned on her for comfort quite a bit. Being without her is HARD. I loved petting her, smelling her fur, and holding her paw. She was precious. Her name was Lucy and we had her from 1998-2013.
 
Tony, what a great photo of Joey! He looks so happy. I'm trying to take as many happy photos of Lily as I can, too. I know that soon, all I'll have is photos and memories. I'm glad to hear he's still eating. Is lasagna his favorite food? You've mentioned it a couple of times now. I don't think I've ever given Lily lasagna, but maybe I should! She loves all people food except for stuff like lettuce. I know she likes meat and cheese. I just don't want to make her stomach upset, maybe I'll buy a small lasagna and give her just a couple of bites to see how she seems to be feeling after that.

It's been two weeks today since Lily got sick. She's getting her surgery staples out tomorrow. I have a list of questions to ask the vet, so I'm hoping that she can give me a better idea of how much the cancer has spread (lymph nodes) and approximately how much time Lily might have left. They initially generically said that most dogs average 3 months after surgery, but she's had seizures and I think lymph node involvement since then, so I don't think she has anywhere close to 3 months. She's not feeling too badly, though. Mornings seem a little bit rough, she's lethargic and sighs a lot in the mornings. She'll lie down, sigh, get up, move 3 feet away, lie down again and sigh again, repeat. That's how mornings are going lately. But then she seems to improve by late morning, and afternoons & evenings she's a bit antsy because she hasn't been allowed to go for a walk since her surgery. We'll be allowed to try short (5 minute) walks once the staples come out tomorrow, so we'll see how that goes. I do have a wagon for her now if she tires out.

I'm coping okay for the moment, too. I went on a bike ride yesterday evening. My legs felt quite strong and I rode fast and far until I tired out. I rode through the arboretum. It's a very pretty place with lots of trees, it's like a big forest in the middle of the city. There's not a lot of wind in there because there are so many trees, and there are few cars driving through there on a weeknight, so it's a pretty ideal place to ride. It is hilly though, so I got tired out from the hills. Towards the end of my ride, my GERD was letting me know that it was not happy. So I headed home and had some more ranitidine to calm that down.

Poor Lily, she didn't know what to think. Usually when I put on my exercise clothes, it means that I'm going to take her for a walk. So she saw me putting on exercise clothes and got excited, and I had to tell her, no, I'm sorry, you're not cleared to walk yet! Poor Lil. Of course there are more storms in the forecast for Wed - Sun, so I don't know when I'll be able to walk her with her wagon once her staples are out. We'll just play it by ear and see how she seems to be feeling and what the weather is doing.
 
Lily got her staples out today and she did great, didn't squirm or anything. We've been given clearance to start walking her again - obviously starting with short walks. We're not sure what her energy level is going to be like, so we're going to give it a try tonight. The weather looks like there's a slight chance of storms, but it probably (hopefully) won't be raining. We will probably just go once around the block to see how she does. If that goes well, then maybe after a couple days of that, we'll go on a somewhat longer walk and will bring the wagon along then in case she tires out along the way.

The vet didn't sugarcoat anything, though (which I appreciate). She said we're in hospice mode now. She's seen this type of cancer many times before and it's almost always aggressive and most dogs don't tend to live longer than the 3 months that they tell everybody. With Lily's seizures, she almost certainly won't make it to 3 months post-op. But, the vet did say that most dogs with this type of cancer don't tend to experience much pain at all. It's a relatively low-pain type of cancer. So that's good to know. As of today she's 15 days post-op. So we're just going to try to appreciate every day that we do get.

A friend of mine went through cancer a few months back - I had crocheted a blanket and gave it to her to support and comfort her before she had her surgery. And, fortunately, the surgeons were able to get my friend's cancer all out with just surgery, so no chemo nor radiation needed. Phew! Now, my friend is supporting me - she sent Lily a care package which arrived yesterday. It had a cute toy and some yummy treats. Lily was very excited to receive new treats! And I was so touched by my friend's support. It was really nice of her. I can't imagine what my friend was feeling when she was going through cancer, but I know she knows some of what Lily is going through, even if Lily doesn't understand it herself. And she surely understands some of what hubby and I are feeling, too. So it was nice to have the support of somebody who's been there & done that (even though of course it was awful that she had cancer too).

So yeah, that's the fitness plan and the Lily plan, a short walk each day and building back up towards longer walks, with the wagon as a back-up plan. She's been quite antsy the past few days especially, I know she's really wanted to go on walks. She'd see me getting ready to go on a bike ride, and she'd get excited because she thought it was walkies time, but it wasn't and that broke my heart trying to tell her that she wasn't allowed to walk yet. I really wonder how much dogs understand about situations like this. Does she know she's sick? I'm guessing she doesn't know that she's dying. She probably just knows that she's been to the vet a lot lately but that she's also getting a lot of treats and yummy food lately. I would guess she doesn't even correlate the two as being related. But who knows.
 
I took Lily for a walk around the block yesterday and she did great. :) The weather was nice and she seemed to be feeling pretty well. We didn't need the wagon, she was able to do a walk around the block without getting too tired out. It was a bit warm out though and she definitely did seem tired and warm by the end of the walk, so I'm glad we kept it short and simple. (The whole walk took about 10 mins tops, and that included time for her to stop and sniff things frequently.)

Today it's been pouring rain all morning, with more rain in the forecast for this afternoon & evening, so unless it magically clears up, we won't take a walk tonight. Tomorrow is looking like better weather, cooler but not rainy which sounds ideal to me. I'm planning another walk around the block with her tomorrow. Will see how she's feeling during the weekend and what the weather is doing then, and will plan accordingly.
 
I'm so happy to hear Lily enjoyed a walk Cat.It will have done her a power of good after being restricted for so long.I hope the weather is kind enough to allow her to enjoy lots more.Eating and sniffing about in the open air,that's what dogs love best of all.And hugs and treats too of course.I hope you are looking after yourself too.
 
I'm trying, but it's still hard to focus on myself. I had lost about 4 lbs when she got sick, and I've been making myself eat, so I've gained back about 2 lbs. Being able to walk with her again, even if it's just short walks, does make me feel a lot better. It gets both of us outside and active which is huge. And I'm so happy that she's doing well enough to be able to walk, so that just by itself makes me feel better. I know she's still dying, but in the meantime she's doing okay so I'm not as worried as I was. It's like we both get to take a little bit of a breather in the midst of all this horribleness. We know the horribleness will come back worse than ever, and soon, but for now we're in the eye of the storm and things are reasonably calm.
 
Great that Lily was able to get out for a short walk , no matter how sick they are it does them good to get out .
 
Tony, yes, it for sure does them good (and us too!). How's Joey doing today? Still eating well and feeling reasonably well, I hope?
 
Hi Cat he's not too bad , he gets bursts of energy every now and then, he's still in love with food , all you have to do is open the refrigerator door and he's at your side waiting for treats,
hopefully the weather will pick up again and he can go for a swim again ,
I think he knows something is wrong with him and it's getting to him ,
but it's great to still have him with us and hopefully we will get a few more weeks with him .
I hope the mood changes are down to the prednisone and its not pain .
 
Tony, I also hope it's not pain. Did your vet give you any pain meds for Joey? Lily seems to be in a low mood mainly in the mornings too - I think I've mentioned this already, but she'll sigh a lot and just sort of lays around and looks at us with sad eyes. But, if I so much as say the word "treat" then she perks right up - the ears go up and the eyes get wide and all of a sudden she's in a much better mood. So hopefully she's not feeling too badly. It's still something that I can remedy with treats anyway. I don't know if she knows that she's sick, it's hard for me to even guess at how much she understands of the situation. (The vet did say that Lily's type of cancer only affects dogs, humans apparently don't get hemangiosarcoma, so it's impossible to say for sure how she's feeling as there's no human comparison.) I'll just keep giving her lots of treats for as long as she wants to eat them, and cuddles and walkies and whatever else she wants.

On that note, we weren't able to have a walk yesterday as it rained for much of the day. Today is also dreary and drizzly and quite cool - it feels like autumn already. It's like we skipped August & Sept and went right to October. The trees suddenly are starting to change color, and I could hear geese honking this morning, which I only hear when they're either flying south for winter or flying back up here to the north during the spring (and they never fly south this early!). So it really feels like autumn, so much for summer! It's drizzly and miserable to the point that a walk with Lily probably won't happen tonight, either. I'll make sure she gets plenty of treats and cuddles to make up for it. Hopefully tomorrow we can go on a short walk. If the weather is still bad over the weekend, I think I'm going to put Lily in the car and take her to the pet store. We'll walk around in there for a bit and she can pick out treats, toys, whatever she wants. There are several pet stores in town and I think all of them allow dogs on leashes in the store, so if the weather is bad all weekend then maybe we'll just go to a couple different pet stores! At least that way she can get out of the house, go for a car ride, have a bit of an adventure and walk around a bit, sniff new things, maybe meet other dogs, etc.
 
Cat,I hope you don't mind me saying this.Because Lily isn't exercising much and getting lots of treats are you worried about her gaining weight ? I know it seems silly at this time in her life to worry about weight gain,but it might cause her discomfort in her poorly places.Idon't know.It was just a random thought.Maybe the cancer will cause her to lose weight and the extra weight will even things out.I hope I haven't offended you.I honestly don't mean to.
 
Carol, no worries, you haven't offended me. She has gained weight recently. She's gained 3 lbs since her surgery 17 days ago! I know she's going to gain weight. She was 50 lbs when we got her nearly 7 years ago. And we've tried for 7 years to get her to lose weight, because she should be more like 35 lbs. She was 36 lbs as of the day of her emergency surgery, so close! And yet so far, because now we don't care. She was at 39 lbs at her vet appointment on Wednesday. And I'm fine with that. She was walking and feeling just fine when she was 50 lbs, so I don't care much if she gains more weight. I just want her to be happy, and food definitely makes her very happy, so she can eat whatever she wants. She only has at best a couple months left anyway, so I'm going to let her enjoy her remaining time as much as she can. As far as we know, the cancer was in her spleen (which was removed, they took out both the tumor and the spleen) and is definitely in her omentum (the fatty covering over the intestines), probably in her brain, and maybe in her lymph nodes. The omentum would be the most worrying one in terms of discomfort, if she gains weight in her belly then I would think that might put her in some discomfort. For right now, though, making her happy with food outweighs the potential that she might be in discomfort later. And, I mean, she's got cancer, at some point she's going to be in discomfort regardless. So it's something I'll monitor, but I'm not too worried about her gaining weight at the moment, I'd rather keep her feeling happy in the short-term because all we have left is short-term.

And she is pooping a lot, too, and her digestion doesn't look to be the best. For awhile she was having a lot of diarrhea, that seems to have slowed up significantly and her stools are more formed now. But, hubby in particular is feeding her a lot of carrots, and they don't seem to digest well for her. We see a lot of chunks of orange in her stool lately. I know that when my digestion isn't the best and I'm pooping a lot, I tend to lose weight, so I would not be surprised if a similar thing happens with Lily (or at least if she maintains her weight). We are going to ease up on the carrots and try other things, like green beans, to see if those digest better. I know plain yogurt is good for dogs' digestion too. So we'll try a few things like that. Once again, my grocery shopping list for my dog is longer than my list for myself and hubby! :p But I wouldn't have it any other way right now. She's the priority, for whatever amount of time she has left.
 
Actually Cat, to contradict myself, it's maybe a good sign that she's putting on or maintaining her weight.We think of human cancer patients as being fragile and gaunt towards end of life.Is it the same for our furry friends,I don't know.Enjoy your weekend best you can.
 
Cat-a-Tonic said:
And she is pooping a lot, too, and her digestion doesn't look to be the best. For awhile she was having a lot of diarrhea, that seems to have slowed up significantly and her stools are more formed now. But, hubby in particular is feeding her a lot of carrots, and they don't seem to digest well for her. We see a lot of chunks of orange in her stool lately. I know that when my digestion isn't the best and I'm pooping a lot, I tend to lose weight, so I would not be surprised if a similar thing happens with Lily (or at least if she maintains her weight). We are going to ease up on the carrots and try other things, like green beans, to see if those digest better. I know plain yogurt is good for dogs' digestion too. So we'll try a few things like that. Once again, my grocery shopping list for my dog is longer than my list for myself and hubby! :p But I wouldn't have it any other way right now. She's the priority, for whatever amount of time she has left.
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Another thing you may want to try is pureed pumpkin in a can - NOT the pie mix! Our dog gets anal gland blockage and the vet recommended pumpkin as a fiber supplement to keep things flowing well. The fiber may help bulk up her stools a little more and make things regular. It's also really good for them as it has a lot of beta carotene and Vitamin C. I'd recommend getting organic, too. A lot of specialty pet stores sell cans branded for pets, but it's not necessary. Just buy the stuff on the grocery store shelf. Glad to hear she's doing pretty well! :)

http://www.akc.org/content/health/articles/can-pumpkin-help-with-dog-diarrhea/
 
Thanks for the suggestion about pureed pumpkin! Adding it to my grocery list right now. :) She's been pretty flatulent tonight, so anything that helps her digestion is VERY much appreciated right now!

I am going to have to share the pumpkin between the cat and the dog, now that I think about it. My cat loooves pumpkin. She's 14, and the first October that we had her when she was about 6 months old, I was carving a pumpkin and putting the slimy pumpkin guts into a bowl. My cat came up and started eating the pumpkin guts like it was some great treat! She's a very odd cat, she also really loves citrus.
 
So I found the canned 100% pumpkin puree. And my cat didn't like it! :p Lily liked it just fine, though, so I've been giving it to her. I also got plain yogurt which both of them seem to like quite a lot. And Lily is getting steak and green beans too. We also went to a local pet store on Sunday, and when they asked if I was looking for anything in particular, I said I'm just looking for treats because my dog has cancer and I want her to have lots of treats. Well, they gave her tons of free samples! She was in hog heaven, ha ha.

We've had a few walks around the block but now we're going to have to figure something else out, and it's not because of anything that Lily did. There's a house around the corner which has a fenced yard. I had never seen dogs in that yard before, but then at one point over the weekend I saw 2 big pit bulls in that yard. They were barking and snarling at Lily as we walked past. And then, very suddenly, they both shimmied right under the fence! They very fortunately did not attack us once they got to us, they actually seemed very unsure of what to do and just stood there. It was pretty scary though when those two big dogs came under the fence at us! So I don't want to see those dogs again. We'll go walking a different route from now on!

Stress-wise I'm feeling horrendous. Work has once again been a nightmare, I'm doing so much work and I'm doing it well, but because of the actions of others I'm made to feel like I can't do anything right, and I'm repeatedly reminded that I'm the lowest rung on the ladder (I had clawed my way up to second-lowest rung, but then the one person who was below me changed jobs and I had to absorb a lot of her work and I was told nobody else could absorb certain duties because it's beneath them). I'm going to start looking for a new job once Lily passes away. I can't deal with such nonsense anymore, it's not good for my health. I need to deal with my dog's cancer and death first, then my job stress.
 
Sending support and hugs and kisses for Lily .
Don't let work upset you Cat , all they are are narrow minded people who are not worth the effort,
You can always get another job , just put yourself and Lily first and enjoy your time with her .
 
Tony, I know I can always get another job, it's more the health insurance that I'm worried about. If I quit my job and start a new one, usually the new health insurance from the new job doesn't kick in until a few months. So I'd potentially be without insurance for a little while and that would not be good. If I flared or something I could easily rack up many thousands of dollars in medical debt. My hospitalization last year, which was 5 days/4 nights in the hospital and a colonoscopy plus a few other tests (mostly blood and stool tests) cost over $27,000 before insurance. So that's the part that worries me, I'd have to basically just deal with it or go into serious debt if I flared during those few months without insurance. Certain meds I might have to go without, too - like, I pay $10 per month for Lialda right now, but without insurance I know it costs over $500 per month and obviously I cannot afford that. Sooo, we'll see. I'm weighing my options right now. Hubby suggested that we get an Obamacare plan for a few months until the new insurance would kick in, but I know those plans can be pricey too. I need to do some more research on my options.

Fitness-wise, I was exhausted yesterday after getting home so did not walk Lily. I'm hoping to take her on a walk tonight, probably with her wagon and we might head towards the dog park to see if her friends are around. Today is 3 weeks since her surgery. Her lymph node tumor in the right armpit area has gotten noticeably bigger in just the past week or so, so I know the cancer is growing rapidly and I'm sure she probably doesn't have much time at all left. But, she doesn't seem to be in pain and she's still eating with great gusto. This morning, she did the "happy dance" (jumping on alternating feet) as I brought her her breakfast, and then after she ate she did her "happy roll" (rolling on the carpet and going, "grr, grr, grr") which she only does after she's eaten a meal that she really enjoyed. So I know she's still very much enjoying eating! She's had an exorbitant amount of treats and food lately and she's loving every minute of that. As long as she seems to be not in pain and still enjoys her food, I know she's doing reasonably okay.

Tony, how's Joey doing? I hope he's also still eating and enjoying his lasagnas! :)
 
Sorry Cat we take universal free health for granted here and we don't realise how hard ye have it in the US ,
Nice to hear that Lily is still enjoying her food and rolling around making happy noises ,Joey does that as well ,
Joeys has had a few good days but like Lily I think the growths on his neck have started to enlarge again,
I will give it a few days and increase the pred as the vet suggested,
Its funny because as the pred becomes less effective the more Joey seems be be more like his old self ,
Hugs and kisses to Lily and strength to you to help you through this .
 
I really wish we had universal health care here. It would make changing jobs so much simpler and easier! Having health insurance directly tied to an employer, it means that changing jobs changes everything about your healthcare. If I get another job, I don't know what insurance plan I'd be offered, how much I'd have to pay out of my paycheck for it vs what the employer would pay, what the deductible would be and the out of pocket max, and if I could still see my same doctors, or if I'd have to change doctors, etc. It's kind of a terrifying thought because there are so many unknowns! If we had universal health care, I could change jobs without worrying about any of that stuff. But everything to do with healthcare in this country is just such a big cause for worry when you've got a chronic illness. It's a terrible system that punishes the sick on so many levels.

Give Joey a big hug for me as well. I'm glad to hear he's still feeling reasonably well and somewhat like his old self. I've been seeing shades of Lily's old self come out in recent days, too. She's started barking again when I get home from work - she used to do that every day, the she got sick and didn't bark hardly at all (I think barking hurt her belly where the incision is). Now she's back to barking regularly, which is good because I think that means she's feeling better. She's just started playing with her toys again too, she had no interest in toys for a couple weeks after her surgery, but on Sunday she picked out a new squeaky ball at the pet store and she's been playing with it a bit here and there. There's a lot of little things like that. Enjoy having your old Joey back for as long as you have him! I'm enjoying my barky, playful, happy, hungry Lily for sure.
 
I should add that - if I were to get laid off from my current job, I could cobra my current health insurance (basically, I'd pay 100% of the healthcare premiums but I'd get to keep my same plan for something like 6 months or a year or until I got a new job). If I quit my job, I cannot cobra my coverage, hence the gap in coverage until it kicks in with the new employer. There have been some shakeups at work lately, so part of me wants to hang on and maybe get laid off - I'd probably get a decent severance package as well as being able to cobra my coverage. So, there's that. It's a hard situation to know what the best thing to do is.
 
I had a much better day yesterday. I think both my boss and I were in terrible moods on Monday and we sort of affected each other. There's been a lot of stress at work lately, like I said! But my boss is usually quite good. We just both had a bad day.

Hubby and I walked Lily yesterday evening, and that went quite well. We brought Lily and her wagon to the paved path section of the dog park, and most of her friends were there. One of the ladies called our neighbor who has corgis, so she brought her dogs over as well, so then almost the whole group was there. Of the group who wasn't there, there is one guy who has 2 dogs, and one of his dogs has the same type of cancer that Lily has. I'm hoping we can bump into him next time we go to the dog park.

Lily had a great time seeing her friends. She did get quite warm and tired out, so we alternated putting her in the wagon and letting her walk. She drank a lot of water and had to potty a lot, including she had some watery diarrhea. It was a bit warm out though (probably about 80 F) and it was her first time back at the park since before she got sick 3 weeks ago. So I'm presuming it was probably a combination of warm weather, exertion from walking, excitement at seeing her friends, and maybe what she's been eating lately (so many treats and people food). She seems fine aside from that episode of diarrhea yesterday.

I think I will take her walking again tonight, but we'll be more brief - I think maybe just up the street and back (avoiding those pit bulls that can get under their fence, of course). It's supposed to rain tomorrow and maybe Friday as well, so we'll walk again when we're able to. Hubby is going to be away working again all weekend, so it'll just be me and the pets. I'm going to do a lot more of my usual - sewing, crocheting, etc. If the weather is nice then I might go hiking by myself for a couple of hours, as I think that would be too much for Lily to go hiking with me. I have to get used to hiking solo without her anyway, and getting out into nature and being alone with my thoughts helps me de-stress a lot. So, that's the tentative plan, if the weather cooperates and if I'm feeling up to it.
 
Lily and I walked about 2 blocks down and back (so 4 blocks total) yesterday and that seemed about a good amount of walking for her. She was fairly tired out afterwards. It looks like rain this afternoon/evening, so no walk tonight. Maybe tomorrow evening.

Today's a bucket list day for Lily. Our favorite football (American football, not soccer) team is the Green Bay Packers. Lily always barks when they score a touchdown. I had been hoping that she'd at least survive long enough to watch the first pre-season Packer game, and that game is happening tonight! She's going to get a lot of treats and we'll watch the game together while we eat some yummy stuff, I think that will be really nice. Hubby's going to make me a belly-safe pizza (I use a small amount of alfredo sauce instead of tomato sauce because of my GERD, and goat cheese because it's safe for my lactose intolerance) and Lily will have some yummy steak.

The weekend is looking quite nice and there's a forest park nearby that I actually haven't been to yet, so I think I'm going to check that out and do some hiking. The yarn store is also not far away from this particular park, ha ha, so of course I am thinking I'll stop and do some shopping too!
 
Our team did indeed win. :) It was only a pre-season game so it doesn't really count, but it was still a fun game to watch and it was nice that we won. Lily had lots of treats during the game and then she zonked out and took a nap. I guess the excitement of football coming back was just too much for her. ;)

It's chilly and rainy here today. It wasn't supposed to rain today so that's a bit of a bummer. Probably no walking tonight because of the weather. I'll probably just stay in tonight and do some sewing. There's always plenty of things to sew. Will try to be active the rest of the weekend as the weather looks like it should be pretty good.
 
Tony, she's feeling well. Seems to be in no pain and still really enjoying treats. I made this video of her yesterday evening.

https://youtu.be/Sm2WFgQYGxI

As for me, I woke up with a headache but otherwise I'm doing okay. How are you and Joey doing?
 

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