Limericks to choose from

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At my pic you do stare
At my smile and bod so fair
Do not deny
We all know you'll lie
You copied and pasted to share!
 
Fen's a bathroom connoisseur
Farm's an entrepreneur
The girls skills are getting buff
Are rhymes are more than fluff
Next we'll be needing a chauffeur

WORD!
 
Take it easy on Fen
Nevermind, he can defend
He'll make you cry
With tears in your eye
You'll wish you had a friend.
 
Slappin' da bitches,
we know they're in stitches.
Our rhymes they be clever,
the ladies'? No never.
They just be scratchin' their itches.
 
You love it so much
Your dieing to touch
Long hair and beard
Nothing to be feared
You have never witnessed such.
 
farm said:
You love it so much
Your dieing to touch
Long hair and beard
Nothing to be feared
You have never witnessed such.
Click to expand...

:ylol2: :ylol2: :ylol2: Change your name from Hayseed to Grizzly Adams. Sorry. You know I love your picture.
 
Shantel said:
The only itches I have are from my Remicade
You are gonna wish you had a barracade
Cuz when Pop and I are done
You are gonna wanna run
Like whimpy little girls to your blockade!!
Click to expand...

Get him girl. He needs to view the Gillette commercial
 
That's not me
Its our pop you see
Ole Karl Childers
The chithouse builder
Now this rhyme should make you pee!
 
Shantel said:
You KNOW you love us Farm
You just don't want to raise an alarm
You can't wait to post every day
It makes you happy like the flowers in May
Peaches and Pop you would never ever never want to harm :OP
Click to expand...

I never get mad
And hope you ain't sad
I love you guys
I ain't gonna lie
For this battle I am glad!
 
Us girls have cooties?
We know you check out our booties.
We stll love you guys
I guess that's why we sigh
Stop being so snootie
 
imisspopcorn said:
Us girls have cooties?
We know you check out our booties.
We stll love you guys
I guess that's why we sigh
Stop being so snootie
Click to expand...
LMAO!!
 
My kids are going to be late for school
I get caught up in all this drool
Stay away, I can't abide
I'll see you on the flip side
It's fun to be a fool
 
You all make me smile,
which is nice for a while.
Limericks with wit,
about stupid mindless chit.
This thread's the best by a mile.
 
Since you complain like a witch
My pic I did switch
Like it better?
I can sure chomp on cheddar
But these teeth sure are a b.......pain.
 
farm said:
Since you complain like a witch
My pic I did switch
Like it better?
I can sure chomp on cheddar
But these teeth sure are a b.......pain.
Click to expand...

A picture of candy porn?
I must say, a star is born
Make them last
Don't eat too fast
If you choke I would mourn.:)
 
Last edited:
Nice to know you care
Even though my head is bare
I like candy
I think it's dandy
If I had enough I'd share
 
That means I'm a great influence.

So farm fell a ways
But yet avoided the grave
That got him thinking
He better stop drinking
That way he wouldn't be so brave.
 
I am still in too much shock....and ticked off at you to write a limerick! You need a good whooping. Where's my can opener, I'm about to open a can of whoop a%@!
 
What's a matter?
Why the clatter?
You think I was drinking?
Now what are YOU thinking?
I just had to rhyme something better than...splatter!!
 
No pic of my noggin. Sorry. It's ugly enough without the knots.
(And I was NOT drinking at all yesterday, just a limerick.)
 
No, I didn't think you were drinking
I can say that without blinking
We lub you very much
My heart I did clutch
Before climbing the roof please do some re-thinking.
 
No noggin' for you
Not while it's blue
I'm too sore, as said
To hold a camera above my head
It is nice to know I have some friends that are true.
 
Farm fell on his head,
I'm glad he ain't dead.
His bros and sisses,
all would miss his,
Humor that gets us out of bed.
 
No I had to get my horses shoed. Then I took a nap, so sleepy. Trying to fight it.
 
I guess anyone with my phone # could. My son is home now so he'll wake me up at 9:20 if I go to sleep in the next few minutes.
 
Wrestling comes on at 9:00 but the John Cena match will be around 9:20 or so, good detective work peaches!!
 
No double vision, I didn't ask about sleeping; so I slept most of the night thanks to Flexeril.
Head still hurts but not like a migraine.
My back and neck hurt the most of anything.
 
Farms back at work
Though his body still hurts
He wants to go home
But there's no where to rome
Man I feel like a jerk.
 
I can't wait til June
To see you bafoons
I'll drive up there fast
Stopping only for short "blasts"
You'll know me by my tat, 2 wolf moon!
 
Yes I'm at work
Though I hurt
I gotta be
Cause we missing the VP
That vacationing jerk!
 
In traffic Fen is stuck,
boy this does suck.
In my car
but ain't getting far.
Do chickens really cluck?
 
Chickens will cluck
If you have some luck
Just stroke em
Don't choke em
Or you will be in the muck.
 
Shantel said:
Well, since Carrie SAID IT....


Your chicken you should eh, well, you know
while your car you wish you could cloak
so through traffic you could fly
in your mistress flying high
Yes, you know you are a lucky bloke!
Click to expand...

Hey, maybe Fen is really Bat Man! NY is Gotham right! Hmmm?
 
Fen patrols Gotham city.
Crime fighting can be gritty
The bat mobile is shiny and silver
It makes the girls shiver
His arch enemy is a woman named kitty.(aka:Cat Woman)
 
Batman ... Am I he?
Hmmm... Let's see.
I'm mysterious and my car is wow,
I hit bad guys with a Kah-Pow!
Yes... It must be.
 
BATMAN.jpg


Jillian is a lucky girl.
 
Shantel said:
Well then if Batman you truly are
Why didn't you see the bat signal from the bar?
I waited and waited
and well...waited and waited
And you never showed with your wowish car!
Click to expand...
:ylol2: :ylol2: :ylol2:

I wonder if Farm is Robin, The Boy Wonder? Wasn't Robin an acrobat in one of the movies? And Farm does do all his own stunts.....Hmm I think we have unearthed a secret!
 
:ylol2: :ylol2: :ylol2:
I'm with ya there.....

But the image of them in spandex....can you do photoshop?
 
ROFLMAO!!!!

I like the batman nickname. Farm's more like Spiderman. He climbs roofs.

We should wear underoos to the reunion.
 
Batman and Wolverine baby yeah!

What a JOKE
My ribs are BROKE
The ER didn't find
Didn't even seem to mind
But when I say malpractice, they'll choke!!
 
If I'm spiderman you say it like this

Spid - er - man Rhymes with Kid - er - man
 
Hillybilly delux
Slick pickup trucks
Down in a hollar
Like a dog on a collar
That wants to plucks!
 
Ya know, she don't do a thing for me. Say what you will but she is too fake.
 
Shantel said:
I get the feeling Farm isn't used to being anybody's sidekick!!!
Click to expand...
I'm usually the, what do they call it, Oh yeah instigator!! LOL
 
Ha! Even if i don't fit in it by then, it'll be worth the trip to laugh at my crazy ass, I promise!!
 
Oh no, you must wait.
If we were going to meet in NY I was gonna give that nekkid guitar player a run for his money. I pick a little guitar too, in my underroos!!
 
Shantel said:
Don't make that baby hurt himself trying to get into spandex!! Think about how two broken ribs (and a torn up back) would feel if you were trying to hike spandex up your legs and OVER your butt!!!
Click to expand...
Oh man, that's a visual I don't need.
 
I think I'll go to bed
This medicine has went to my head
BUt I'll be back
After a quick nap
Then catch up on what I ain't read.
 
G'nite ones with crohns
Don't pick up the phone
They try to sell
When your sleepy as hell
Let it ring like you are long gone!

Later peeps!
 
Farm thinks he is Wolverine
In yellow spandex he is mighty keen
He plans to wear it at the re-union
Thankfully it's not a Holy Communion
We will all laugh so much, it's likely we'll bust a spleen:)
 
Birdie Birdie in the sky
Dropped some dody in my eye
It Sting, It Burn
It made my stomach churn
I sure am glad FEN can't fly!
 
Going to DC
To see what we see
Gonna have some fun
With my loved ones
Can't wait til ya meet me!
 
It's quite in here
No crohnies are near
Guess I'll go to bed
And rest my weary head
For now all is well and clear!
 
Shaz calling out pervs
Boy she's got the nerve
Taking no flack
We got her back
I got nothing to rhyme with nerve!
 
Give Spiderfarm a little more time
He fell after a big climb
He bumped his head
Thankfully he's not dead
Or, maybe he's past his prime???


And you thought I was going to be nice:)
 
I gotta say that this is by far the most comical thread ever! Don't think I've ever laughed so hard on this forum, LOL
 
Fen went on a hunt,
it wasn't a publicity stunt.
He made his bro proud,
his buddies shouted out loud,
"Damn, that Yank got shootin' talent."
 
farm said:
Shaz calling out pervs
Boy she's got the nerve
Taking no flack
We got her back
I got nothing to rhyme with nerve!
Click to expand...

Ha! the perve comment was related to someone talking about boys at school asking them to choke their chickens! Somehow it ended up on th wrong thread?!

Can't be arsed doing a proper rhyme
I hope that's not considered a crime
Maybe I'll feel more like it next time....
 
I can imagine Fen hunting in his Batman costume
I bet he'd be in full bloom
He pulled the trigger
with much viger
Now he's locked in a padded room.:eek2: :eek2:
 
Ya know what? My limericks suck.
But funny, I don't give a....... crap.
So I just read this thread
While my fingers lay dead
And I wish my girlies good luck :)
 
Shantel said:
Hee hee.....been thinking bout getting this moved to the lounge - they can do that can't they?
Click to expand...

PUHLEASE! I've been racking my itty bitty brain, but can't think of anything because my vocab is too raunchy. No matter how hard I try, I just can't keep it rated PG. I'm horrible.
 
Shantel said:
Good - then you can be my dork friend and we can be dorks together!

We is dorks
we use lots o' corks
you know...for our bums
for when we get the runs
and only eat food with sporks!
Click to expand...


SPORKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love sporks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

spork-3.jpg
 

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